Sunday, November 16, 2008

A Letter of "Apology" to my Delightful Neighbor Below

Dear [I'm sorry, I didn't get your name because you just got right to the point. So I'll just call you "miserable lady below me"], 

I am sorry for disrupting your peaceful world that you have enjoyed up to this point. I'm sorry for causing your life to "fall apart." We didn't get to finish our conversation yesterday after you put your hand up in the air and walked away from my front doorstep in the middle of the day. After thinking about it for the last 24 hours there are some things that I didn't get to say. 

In response to some of your comments: 

I'm really sorry that "me and my 3 kids" had to move above you. That men and women are still creating offspring that live with them and that we, too, need a place to live. Unfortunately the neighborhood you chose to live in here in NY has quite a number of families and now one of those families has rented the apartment above you. Sorry about that. 

I'm sorry that you chose to work from your home this one Saturday, which happened to be a rainy one and that my kids were having fun playing with their Dad in the middle of the day because it's one of the only days they get to see their Dad during the week.

I'm very sorry that I "can't do anything about my kids." And that I'm "so inconsiderate," even though I took them out for a walk early in the morning, in the rain because it was so early and I didn't want to disturb my neighbors. And how "unthoughtful," I was to be heading out the door, once again, right when you knocked on my door to chew me out in the MIDDLE OF THE DAY!

 And yes, I'm sorry that we may just be here on Thanksgiving weekend, in our own home. Do tenants in this building typically have to ask when they can stay in their own apartments? I'll have to reread my leasing contract. 


Now is where I start getting really mean, I just can't help myself.

I'm sorry that your "boyfriend won't even spend the night at your apartment anymore." That's really a shame that somebody that doesn't pay rent in the building I live in can't shack up with you in your apartment. Maybe if he really loved you he would marry you instead of just using you and you could go live together in the same apartment--maybe even in one that doesn't let kids into that building :)  In fact he probably is thankful that we moved in so now he has a good excuse to not stay over til the morning. See? I told you I get mean. 

And I would be even sorrier if you do in fact end up having to move. What a shame that would be to not have a neighbor like you. 

So if you'd ever like to talk this over maybe you could act like an adult and we could come up with some sort of solution instead of walking away like one of my children. Or maybe you could even answer your door the next time I follow after you to work out this little problem instead of hiding behind your peep-hole and pretending you didn't just walk into your apartment.  That would be the more civilized way to handle problems. Until then, I'll just write you letters on my blog. 

With sincerest apologies

Me and My 3 Kids




19 comments:

darcie said...

some people are just plain miserable! i think the ugliest trait i can think of is to be intolerant of children (you know when you can tell people in a restaurant are bugged you're there?). it is the biggest sign of immaturity and i can say with complete confidence that children are the most special humans on the earth.

Anonymous said...

That is unreal. Not sure what to say, but just hang in there and do what you can!!! -Matt

Ming said...

You're neighbor seriously did that? Unbelievable! How old is this woman?

Nathan said...

Welcome to NY city. Great letter - thanks for sharing.

Casey said...

Oh no Ash... Jr and I went through the SAME thing when we were first married. The lady below us would get mad that JR was up and taking a shower to go to work at 6am. She even complained that Mackenzie learning to walk and falling hurt her ears. Hang in there!!

Ann said...

Your delightful neighbor should have known better than to take on a mama bear and her cubs.

Dolphinsbarn said...

If Todd helps me, I'll fight her.

Ann said...

awwww! how nice of your neighbors to welcome you to the neighborhood so lovingly! seriously: good luck with her! i'm sure you'll work it out-you're way nicer than me. i'd have kept stomping on the floor all day long! and i would have gotten out the musical instruments, too! good luck!

Alan Dickson said...
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Allison said...

I LOVE IT!!!! :) I think you should send it.

Kristin said...

Why do people feel like they have a license to be rude just because they live in NYC?

Jaime said...

Oh man, I thought those experiences wouldn't happen in your first month... Man, I love crotchedy, miserable, unhappy NYers. She is secretly super duper jealous of your sweet, happy family life - that's what I remind myself whenever they tell me I am a crap mom in the grocery store cuz my kiddo doesn't have a hat on.

Sorry to say I have yelled back more than once and yes, one of those time I was carrying a kid, pregnant and barefoot. Wonder how good her story was to her friend...

Give 'er hell Ash!

Trish said...

I would kindly remind her she was once a child too and then throw my hand up like she did and walk away...wait, did I type that out loud? J/K.. Maybe she will come to her senses and you guys can have a civilized conversation!
Good Luck!!

Meagan said...

Ashley don't worry I will be there soon and I think Madeline and I can take her.

really I'm sorry things like this make me so mad one time a old mean lady got mad at me at a grocery store because Tyler was in her opinion being loud and unruly really he was laughing because I was playing peek-a-boo and that's what babies do at their funny looking moms. As she walked away I said very loud some people need to turn down their hearing aids.... so yes, I got mean but I still think it's one of my best lines. Just vent in your blog we are here for you!

Kelli Salter said...

I'm thinking tae bo work out with the boys at 6am right above her bedroom

Giandrea said...

The worst part about things like that is that as much as I just want to laugh and move on with my day I can't stop playing it over and over and over in my head. Blah!!!

Britty said...

you are rad!

Anonymous said...
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Pete and Repete said...

Looks like this post conjures up comments that are prone to be deleted by blog administrator. -So I'll just say that it almost sounds like you guys moved into our old place. Are the neighbors above you homosexual pot smokers? And does the neighbor below run a nursing home?