Thursday, March 31, 2011

Another "pee in the botttle" gone wrong.

I know I won't be able to top the, "Todd drank Toby's pee," story, but I had to laugh [later] at the scene that took place in the car today on my way home from dropping Todd off at the Long Beach airport.

I had just gotten on the freeway to head back home with the 3 boys in the back of Todd's car. As we got on the freeway I made my way over to the carpool lane because there was a bit of traffic I did not want to be in if I could help it. As soon as I did, Chase starts panting, "I have to go potty! I have to go potty!" And like every 3 year old he of course had to go right that second and was not giving me any fair warning.

I looked at the traffic to the right of me...barely moving... and the double yellow lines of the carpool lane...and then down at my always trusty gatorade bottle. I then pictured in my head the recent story of my sister Sunny (mother of 8) bragging about how she was able to reach back, get her son out of his car seat, while driving of course, and with one hand on the wheel and one on the bottle her little guy beautifully took care of business and they went happily along their way without stopping.

So that's what I set out to do.

Well...I might as well have just told Chase to unbuckle and stand up and pee all over Ben and Toby and the whole back seat because that's pretty much what happened.

In his panic and urgency he didn't pull his pants down all the way, Ben tried to assist in the bottle holding, but the "equipment" was aimed upward towards Ben's face so as soon as it started Ben got pee in his eyes, immediately dropped the bottle while Chase continued to pee and cry at the same time. So then Ben is crying in a panic because "Chase just peed all over" him, so then I'm yelling at Toby who's reading a book and laughing until I start really yelling at him to help, which then makes him start to cry...so then I have all 3 of them in the back seat crying in hysterics and everyone with pee on them.

I'm just glad it was Todd's car and not mine.

We all calmed down a little while down the road. Ben commented later that he had been happy all morning, he was happy at school, happy when Dad picked him up from school, but then started having a bad day after Chase peed on his face. I think that would have been my low point of my day too.

With how often we use the "bottle method," while driving we're bound to have a couple backfire on us. I'm actually surprised we haven't had more than we have.

15 comments:

Ginger said...

Oh, I can't stop laughing. You all have a much more exciting life than us! ;-)

Ann said...

Belly laughing coming at ya from New York!!!

DC Diva said...

Hi Ashley! It's Wendy, Mindy's friend. Sometimes I blog stalk you b/c your boys are cute, your stories are hilarious and we just remember that great night w/ the Tobster.

It was finally time to comment on THIS story. OH. MY. GOSH. I was laughing so hard... at both stories! BOYS!!! I have two of them and, um, can't wait (what??) for stuff like this. Yeah right! So glad you're about to get your girl, right?

Kimberly said...

You are so funny. Loved this story.

Meagan said...

I can just hear the dinner conversations going on all over the city last night. "I saw the funniest thing while stuck in traffic today."

Ming said...

OH my gosh Ashley! I LOVE this story. I can picture the whole thing going down and I can't stop laughing. Your boys are hilarious. I've retold your Todd drinking pee story many many times and it ALWAYS kills...this will be my new hilarious party story. :)

My favorite part was when Ben said he was happy all day until Chase peed in his face! lol :))))) Poor guy.

Rachael said...

Hahaha, I was seriously laughing out loud - that is hilarious!

Ann said...

you do realize that once that little girl arrives and is out of diapers, you're going to HAVE to pull over. that's hysterical! no one can tell a story like you. i can picture it!

Aaron said...

Okay, that was the funniest thing I have read in a long time! I literally laughed out loud while reading it during a conference call at work and had to explain to the presenter that I wasn't laughing at him!

Meghann said...

I'm crying from laughing SO hard!!!

erin said...

I, too, blog-stalk you cuz you are so funny but this took the cake! We have had something similar happen but not to this degree...and always funnier hearing it from someone else! Thanks for sharing!!
Erin, Megan's sis

Harris Beach Bums said...

My girls were piled on my lap while I read them your bog post. We all had a great laugh! Thanks!

dave said...

so, so funny. i'm glad it was todd's car too. ;)

Brooke said...

Thanks for the good laugh! As annoying as boy pee can be at times, isn't it soooo much more convenient?!

Megs said...

Tim & I had a good laugh with the family this past weekend reading this story & the previous "pee in the bottle" story. So gross & so funny!